Bull by the Horns

Trick or Treat

2007-10-31T13:25:00.000-07:00

Actually I have one great trick: I can make treats disappear right in front of your eyes!
Happy Howl-o-Ween!!!!!

Office Dog

2007-10-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

I'd like to think that I work for my keep and not entirely spoiled. I punctually arrive at work every morning and offer my coworkers an opportunity to rub my belly to start the day right. Then I diligently patrol the halls and sniff out stray snacks. For all this hard work, I get paid in graham crackers which is directly deposited into my Zelda's Wisdom cookie tip jar.

Dogs have come a long way in the work place. It's good to know that Mom's place of work is an equal opportunity employer much like Google where they too have Yoshka and Nickey to represent the canine department.

House Guest

2007-10-19T15:14:00.000-07:00

We had a guest over the last week. Her name is Bailey (just like the drink)
I tried hard to make her feel at home at Casa de Brody while her mom was away.
I think we even had a "Lady & The Tramp" moment as I offered her my Kong.

Bragging Rights

2007-10-18T15:52:00.000-07:00

Hey Guys--Mom insisted posting this photo since it wasn't enough to just tell everyone she knows that I had recently passed the Canine Good Citizen Test.
She's now officially known as The "Crazy Dog Lady" at the office ever since she's been bragging about it so much. Sheeesh woman!-- you'd think I had graduated from Med school or something.

Pankun's Nanny Diaries

2007-08-17T16:29:00.001-07:00

Remember Pankun and James the Bulldog. Well I guess James has some pups!
*Cute Overload Warning*
Check out this video

Juicy Pooch

2007-07-27T11:22:00.000-07:00

There's never a dull moment in the office specially when my friend Niro, a Japanese Chin/Blueberry Hybrid comes to visit.
Last time he came to visit he was a lovely shade of baby blue. Now he's sporting a darker shade of violet. He must have matured and ripened since then.

Check out the rest of my photos from Niro's Visit

Tenacious B

2007-07-24T14:55:00.000-07:00

What can I say...I've been such a lazy beach bum lately that I haven't even been able to update my blog. I'm just having way too much fun I suppose. I've been to the Beach several times already this summer. Mom feels bad that I don't get to walk as much since it's been crazy HOT so she takes me to the beach where I can atleast wade in the water to cool down.

Another excuse why I haven't been able to update is that I've been helping Dad prepare for something called THE BAR. Good Luck DAD! With a little bulldog tenacity, you'll pass it with flying colors!

iBulldog

2007-06-24T00:46:00.000-07:00

This new Apple ad just gave my mom another justification to buy the new iPhone!

Bulldog Beach Invasion

2007-06-14T12:07:00.000-07:00

I'm planning on heading over to see all my homies out in Long Beach tomorrow. As you can see with this video from last months' meetup, we Socal bulldogs really know how to be total beach bums.

Beach Blanket Bulldog

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Video Credits to Gwen the Bulldog's Folks for making an awesome video

Spatula-Lickn'-Good

2007-06-12T22:49:00.000-07:00

What does Gene Simmons and I have in common?:
We both like to lick excess icing off the spatula...

I should point out this uncanny resemblance to the companies I decide to pitch too..
like Tootsie roll: How many Gene Simmons's does it take to get to the center of a tootsie-roll-tootsie-pop? -- a-one, a-two, a-*cRuNcH
How many Brodys does it take? -- gULP!

Product Spokes Person

2007-06-06T09:39:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking of pitching to various companies for me to become their spokes person. Ive noticed a lot of bulldogs in commercial lately (Petsmart, Mini Coopers) and I want to get in on a piece of that advertising pie.

Apes and Bullies

2007-05-10T09:04:00.000-07:00

Ok I've seen plenty of Bullies with Hairless Apes as owners (or slaves, how ever you look at it) But James the Bulldog is lucky enough to have a HAIRY ape Best Friend named Pan-kun. Pan-Kun the Chimp and his trusty side kick James the Bulldog have plenty of adventures together romping around in Japan! check out James' killer back pack... perhaps I've started a trend
...

Licence to Bark

2007-04-24T13:25:00.000-07:00

Here is proof that I'm of legal age to purchase Happy Tail Ale myself.

"Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays"

2007-04-21T18:57:00.000-07:00

Due to my rock star week ends I'm always sacked on Mondays. This is the familiar view that mom's co-workers see as they pass her door every Monday morning. I of course greet them all with my soothing snores as they suck down on their lattes.

It's a Good Day in Dogville

2007-04-21T18:08:00.000-07:00

This weekend started off well. Here's Chester, the new bulldog on the block. I met up with him for a morning wrestling match at the local park. When we were introduced he was only 4 months old and it was really easy to submit him. He's now 6 months old and he's as big as I am! Looks like his dad has been giving him a little extra kibble.

Check out the rest of my photos with Chester

Then, I headed to my monthy Bulldog Meet up in Santa Monica to chill with the rest of my bulldog homies. A couple miniature humans came too. The little ones always have Cheerio flavored hands. -- talk about finger lickin' good.

I played for hours. My favorite game was "Steal the frisbee from the kids".

Here is a link to all of my photos in Santa Monica. I can't wait until next month's meet up when we all go to the beach --woohoo!

Slobber Monster

2007-04-16T16:04:00.000-07:00

All you need to do is hold a cookie in front of my face and it turns on the slobber faucet automatically.

San Francisco or Bust

2007-04-10T14:41:00.000-07:00

Here are some snippets of my visit to San Francisco. It was a looooongest car ride that I've ever been on. I kept getting up from my car naps asking if we were there yet. Good thing we stopped plenty of times for me to stretch out my legs.

The weekend started of great. Molly showed me around her new digs and all the new toys she's gotten since her arrival.

We then decided to run around the park and go for an extra long walk around town.

Being a country dog, Molly had plenty of questions about the city.

"Y'all have some weird things going on here in California--like wut're those thangs with wheels that make loads of noise?"

"Oh That?," I said "that's called a Bus. It picks you up & takes you around town."

"But ain't that wut humans are for?--to lug yah 'round?" as she scratched her head

"Well, I guess people have to get lugged around too." I replied.

Meet Molly

2007-04-04T19:32:00.000-07:00

This coming week end, I'm going on a weekend field trip to San Francisco where I'll be meeting my new cousin Molly. She's a Boston Terrier that just flew in from Texas and as you can see in this picture -- she's still a little bit jet lagged. Her mom says she's trying hard to get used to city life but I'm sure she'll adjust well in her new forever home in the Bay area.

Papa's got a brand new bag

2007-04-03T20:36:00.000-07:00

Went to REI and got myself a stylin' new back pack. It'll carry my poop bags and water on my hikes--SUHWEET! It even has a funky strobe light for emergency situations like, if my treat supply runs low.

Chatting it up with Matz

2007-03-29T22:21:00.000-07:00

Matz makes her debut on The Late Show as her dad Adam Sandler takes over the show for David Letterman. She's so hot--she makes me want a big bowl of Matzoball soup

The Art of Beggary

2007-03-17T00:45:00.000-07:00

Step #1 - Rest chin on sitting human's knees
Step #2 - Visualize eating snack
Step #3 - Stare at food with lazer-like intensity

Wii Problems

2007-02-20T16:28:00.000-08:00

These new nylabones sure taste funny. Although, they do have a handy bracelet so you don't lose it, but that'll just make it harder to bury.

My folks kept swinging their nylabones around too - it was kinda annoying - like they were about to throw it... but when I tried and chase it, they acted like I was crazy. Ummm, yeah - I'm not crazy.

My folks, on the other hand... definitely a Wii bit crazy.

Brody and the Wii

Commentaries from the Red Carpet

2007-02-11T21:15:00.000-08:00

Although I was going for the LA casual look, it was a black tie event on the red carpet. I guess I didn't get the memo, but I still think I looked hot in my "Rub My Belly for Good Luck" shirt at the Bully beauty contest. Good thing I didn't op for the gold grillz. I had loads of fun though. Lots of new bullies on the block. Mom couldn't stop ogling over all the behbeh bullys. She said It was a live Cuteoverload.com experience.

Congratulations to the winners. Props and a shout out to Dooby who deserves the crown for the awesome costume tribute to Chris Farley's SNL Chippendales skit. I got to stash that idea for next year's Halloween parade.
Check out my photos from the red carpet & paparazzi shots of Tyson!

Photo credit of Dooby from Colin Brown

Sizing up the competition.

2007-02-09T21:08:00.000-08:00

If you feel like an afternoon of heavy breathing and a slobberlicious time, I suggest you get your tiara or top hat on and meet me at the 2007 Long Beach Bulldog Beauty Contest

Tyson the Skateboarding bulldog will be there as well as 200 or so Bulldogs strutting their stuff

My hunch is that Stanly Steamer (Mr. Orange) will be a front runner for tomorrow's competition, --his destist dad gave him gold grillz! Talk about Bling! Maybe I should order some that spell out my name -- Perhaps a Pimp bowl too.

A-Roo-Rooo!

2007-02-05T18:26:00.000-08:00

Can you believe these people actually think they understand what we're saying??

The Secret to Longevity

2007-01-20T21:40:00.000-08:00

This is Boom Boom aka, The Grandmaster. He's 13 bulldog years old (that's 91 human years) --now that's somthing to aspire to. So I asked him his secrets to longevity.

"Well Grasshoper" he said, "it's starts with a healthy kibble diet, none of that human food"

"No Human food?!" I gasped--"that is going to be tough! I don't know if I can handle that."

Then he reached in his treat bag of fortune biscuits, cracked it open and handed me the fortune that said: "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."

I bowed my head in humility..."True that Sensei,True That..."

Hollywood: Room for Two Soccer Stars?

2007-01-12T08:24:00.000-08:00

I think I need to renegotiate my soccer contract, as I'm literally working for kibble and Beckham will be earning 1 million per week for 5 years when he hops the pond here to LALALand. What's he got that I don't? I got the smashing good looks (which I'm banking on to win the 2007 Long Beach Bulldog Beauty Contest) and I can Bend it as well or even better than Beckham. All I lack is a posh trophy wife.

Mole Hunt

2007-01-07T19:21:00.001-08:00

Due to the recent activities occurring over at the Pug Life Ministries, the Armed Revolutionary Forces have undertaken an internal investigation, code-named 'Operation Whack-a-Mole', in an effort to identify exactly how Mr. Blue Bull was able to undermine our security forces and seize Ayatollah Mugsy's compound.

The following information has been released for the public:

1) We have detained several A.R.F. cadets who are suspected to be Blue Bull sympathizers. While all of them currently deny any connection with Mr. Blue Bull, they fit the Bullshevik profile and have squeak very nervously while under interrogation. If we are not convinced of their loyalty to the canine cause, A.R.F. will not hesitate to commence the highly controversial interrogation technique known as 'slobber-boarding'. Either voluntarily or involuntarily - the henchmen of Mr. Blue Bull will spill their white cottony guts.

2) The location and condition of Mr. Mallard is still unknown. However, A.R.F. has recently discovered some photos in the possession of the suspected sleeper-cell cadets which indicate that the Bullshevik terrorists may have prisoners and are treating them in an undognified and uncanine fashion. Unfortunately, the Bullshevik accomplices in the photo have not been identified. Warning: this photo is extremely graphic and may be unsuitable for younger viewers.

3) In a completely unstaged act of defiance, A.R.F. has toppled Mr. Blue Bull's statue. As children danced in the street, a small group of bulldogs climbed the statue's pedestal and attached a rope around it. Shortly afterward, A.R.F. Marines backed up to the monument and attached a chain to the statue, which was originally erected to mark Blue Bull's once loyal service to Pug Life Ministry in their efforts to build a Dogloo Mosque.

Happy Holiday! From Brody the Reindog

2006-12-22T09:17:00.000-08:00

Bully Recruitment

2006-12-18T10:56:00.000-08:00

Due to the dire situation of the canine revolution being without a spiritual guide, I took it upon myself to attend the West Los Angeles Bulldog Meetup at Veterans Park and find new recruits to beef up security as enemies of the canine state might try to undermine our authority. At a not so secret location behind the swing set, gathered the best and brightest new recruits that a Supreme Commander could hope for. Granted, some have not reached their full bulldog circumference I guaranteed them that they'd be a part of the strongest fighting force in the world, spending their days training, working and serving together to protect Canine freedoms. They'd be educated to win the hearts and minds of all humans by offering your belly as a medium of peace and advance the canine agenda of universal access to table food.

Check out the rest of my Meet up pictures.

Holiday Preparations

2006-12-13T08:37:00.000-08:00

I had spent most of last week end motivating Grandpa and Grandma to get off thier hineys and finally get a tree. I made a detailed inspection of the spruce to make sure it was suitable to be propped along side grandpa's gargantuan TV. All the ornaments and lights had to be inspected as well.

At one point, mom, mistook me for the tree--I gave her the evil eye until she finally took the bow off.

In the end, the tree turned out well. It'll provide good shade for all those tech gadgets I've been druling over.

Click here to see all my Holiday preperation photos.

Long Lost Celebrity Child?

2006-12-07T21:37:00.000-08:00

Humm...this magazine cover really explains my ravishing good looks and my naturally puckered lips.

That's Just How We Roll

2006-12-04T09:32:00.000-08:00

Watch out for the next big stud on the rise: Meaty the bulldog from the MTV show "Rob and Big"
Meaty has a pro-skateboarder dad and a large and incharge, personal bodyguard. Meaty is now living the high life as he jets sets to his new home from Arizona to big city lights of LALALand. They tour around Hollyhood, party like rock stars, and eat a whole lot of chicken wings...sounds like my kind of crew.
There's a bit of drama now and then but Most of the show is about Meaty's stinky back end :)

Watch Dog

2006-11-30T21:02:00.000-08:00

It's really tough having to stand guard at my bunker right after dinner as I enter food coma.

Dog Aid 20

2006-11-29T09:58:00.000-08:00

To show dogs care for the struggling pups in Sudan and everywhere else in the world, Bob GelDog, a.k.a Pappy, has gathered a star-STUDed ensemble of dog bloggers to promote peace this holiday season.

I've lent my rapping skillz to this great cause in hopes young pups are inspired to throw a milkbone to the less fortunate. Pup-Daddy in the house!

Clowning around

2006-11-24T09:44:00.000-08:00

Dad took snap shots of me on the computer's built in camera but I honestly think there's something seriously wrong with it...

Turkey's done.

2006-11-23T10:32:00.000-08:00

HERB?! HERB!? Hey! you in there? Um..it's show time. Everyones sorta waiting for you... I know you got dressed yesterday so I know you're prepared...What's that? your tan isn't quite right yet? ooh kaaayy... I'll be right here waiting--just gobble when your done.

The Beagle has landed!

2006-11-23T10:26:00.000-08:00

It wouldnt be Thanksgiving unless you're watching the Macy's thanks giving parade.

Herb's Return

2006-11-21T09:59:00.000-08:00

I was checking up on my private stash of pumpkin biscuits in the fridge when a familiar sight greeted me on the first lower level shelf. It WAS HERB!--just chillin' out. He looks larger than he did last year, maybe a couple pounds heavier. He's pale as usual but Mom said with a little exfoliating scrub (salt and pepper), tanning lotion (olive oil) and a couple hours in the tanning bed (oven) he'll be as golden as Bob Barker after a sunny in day in Florida

I Pity the Fool!

2006-10-31T09:03:00.000-08:00

Happy Howl-o-ween!
I went to the Hautedog Howl-o-ween Parade at Long Beach and had a blast struting my scupted bulky physic as Mr. T.

Mom went a little photo crazy and took loads of pictures of all the other dogs in costume. Check them out!

Franken-Cleaner

2006-10-15T00:47:00.000-07:00

I'm writing a script for the next great Halloween horror flick to hit the big screen. Tim Burton is already bugging me about wanting to direct it.

Eye of the Tiger

2006-10-09T12:59:00.000-07:00

To be more in character for my Halloween costume, I'll need to bulk up a bit...

But these darn narcoleptic spells really put a damper on my work out.

I'll just close my eyes for a second and 'plan' my next workout.

Halloween preparations

2006-10-06T16:17:00.000-07:00

It's never too early to think about your Halloween costume...You don't ever want to procrastinate and end up having a lame outfit. So....
Mom and Dad are in a heated debate on which character I should dress up as for Halloween:

A. MR. T a.k.a B.A. Baracus

OR

B. Dog "Duane" Chapman -a.k.a The Bounty Hunter

It really comes down to wether you're partial to Mohawks or Mullets.....
Place a comment to vote!

Mild Narcolepsy

2006-10-05T15:05:00.000-07:00

Narcolepsy
Main Entry: nar·co·lep·sy
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -sies
is a chronic neurological disorder caused by the brain's inability to regulate sleep-wake cycles normally. At various times throughout the day, people (or dogs) with narcolepsy experience fleeting urges to sleep. If the urge becomes overwhelming, patients fall asleep for periods lasting from a few seconds to several minutes. In rare cases, some people may remain asleep for an hour or longer.

Hum.....I'm no Doctor but I might have a mild case of Narcolepsy. I definitly have the uncanny ability to spontaneously fall asleep at any time, any where and any how ...(as seen on the picture above I've been able to do this since I was a young pup) But make no mistake..one crinkle of a bag of treats or the mere sound of kibble raining down on my bowl will always wake me up.

Dude, atleast I dont have it as bad as this guy...

Mission Accomplished

2006-09-26T23:56:00.000-07:00

As you may have heard, A.R.F. has successfully obtained the release of the Oregon-Five. While most of the details have not been cleared for release (that is, until the movie deal is closed), I would like to make the following comments.

First, I’d like to extend great thanks to Ayatollah Mugsy, who’s spiritual guidance allows our troops to reach their true potential.

As for the mission details, the rescue operation was one of Mock and Paw. Mock and Paw, technically known as rapid ego dominance, is a military doctrine based on the use of overwhelming calm-aggressive force, dominant ego awareness, annoyingly dominant canine behavior, and spectacular displays of snobbery to paralyze an adversary's perception of the battlefield and destroy its will to fight.

The A.R.F. commando unit assembled for this task performed their duties with perfection. On behalf of the A.R.F., I sincerely thank you for your loyalty, bravery and hard work.

Cleveland’s calm-aggressiveness was truly a force to be reckoned with. Even Cesar Millan would have been quivering in submission. Wintson’s application of superior ego leaves no doubt that the enemy is still piddling in humiliation. And, Braxton – who unleashed what must have been the most vicious and uninhibited barrage of annoyance that I have ever witnessed – both proved the shocking effectiveness of Ayatollah Mugsy's Youth Indoctrination Camp Training and solidified his position as one of A.R.F.’s most brilliant and ruthless tacticians.

It is my honor to congratulate Winston, Cleveland and Braxton for a job well done.

Since we safely and successfully returned home, I’m happy to announce that the alert level has been lowered from chartreuse back to pewter and that this evening’s obedience training has been cancelled to make time for some celebration. A special A.R.F. meal has been prepared. Cadets may have their choice of Jerky (Teriyaki or Regular), with cottage cheese, and a side of bacon. Following the meal will be a brief ceremony and autograph signing for the media and general public – followed by a charity fundraiser for Mugsy’s Indoctrination Camp enrollment scholarships.

Those interested in competing in the Tug-o-War or 7-Legged Race should sign up below.

Crash and Burn

2006-09-26T00:44:00.000-07:00

We are experiencing technical difficulties, please stand by...

Undisclosed Location

2006-09-23T23:47:00.000-07:00

"Hello - You have reached Brody the Bulldog of the Armed Revolutionary Forces. I'm sorry I can't answer your call right now, as I am currently airborne, circling indefinitely, in light of the emergency hostage situation and crackdown on canine nationalism. Please leave a message after the beep.

*beeeeeep*

Detainee Intelligence Report

2006-09-23T23:03:00.000-07:00

A.R.F. Intelligence has uncovered the following information regarding the identification of the canine detainees currently being held at the Doggonamo Detention Center in Eugene, Org.

Sources indicate that there are actually 6 canines involved, however as of yet, their names are unknown.

In addition to being accused of taking revenge on Oklahoma-Oregon referees, four of the hostages are alleged to have traveled to China in late 2001 with the intent of getting to Afghanistan to organize a rawhide smuggling ring. Unfortunately, no information has been uncovered regarding the background or identity of the fifth detainee.

The sixth canine, who is the ex-wife of one of the hostages, allegedly wired kibble funds to her ex-husband to support the group's efforts - and is currently at large, but possibly hiding out in the area of where the other five were originally arrested.

Dental Hygiene

2006-09-17T18:19:00.000-07:00

Mom and Dad got it in their heads that it would be fun to brush my teeth. Last time I checked, getting a head lock and proding a plastic thumble with bristles into my mouth isn't anyone's idea of a good time... Can you guys just give me a Greenie and get it over with?!

Com-pu-tor yip yip yip uhhh-huh

2006-09-14T21:35:00.000-07:00

I remember, back when I was a pup, my folks would teach me new things every day. This is a 'frying pan'. These are 'car keys'. This is 'the vacuum'. I'm sure they wanted me to grow up to be a well rounded and social guy. You know the deal.

However, I'll never forget the first time they showed me the internet. I was amazed and I knew immediately how important it would be and how much fun it would be to sniff and drool on. It was such a special moment - I'm sure I'll never forget it.

That's why I was so excited to stumble upon this video of two pups discovering a computer for the first time. I'm not sure what breed they are - but you can tell just how excited they are.

I've got Good News & Bad News

2006-09-12T13:31:00.000-07:00

Which do you want first?

I hope you said 'Bad News' because... my digital camera is messed up!

The LCD screen stopped working. Phooey. I hope this won't have a negative impact on my photography skillz. My face is smooshed flat, so peering through the little view finder thingy shouldn't be too bad. Of course, half of the fun of having a digital camera is gone... since I can no longer see my shots as soon as I click'em. Anyhow, I'm making my camera stay in bed for a few days - in the hopes that it gets better.

The Good News is that my blog was selected as dogmark's "Cool Dog Site of the Day" for September 8th!

Dogmark also has a "Cool Dog Site of the Month" Award - but we'll have to wait until September ends before they'll accept votes for September's sites. But don't worry - In October, I'll remind you to go vote for your favorite.

Salty Dog

2006-09-06T16:31:00.000-07:00

As promised, here are more photos from my long week end at the Beach and Spa! Enjoy

Forget WEB surfing...

2006-09-02T09:22:00.000-07:00

YEay!

I'm going to the Dog Beach today! With the Pant-o-meter on full tongue, this is good news. Afterwards, I'll hit the Spa for a double dose of relaxation.

Sounds like a busy day... hope I have the energy...

Mom says I'm gonna be a speed bump on the living room floor. Dad says that's ok, since that's what I'm designed for anyways.

This photo is from last time I went to the dog beach - but I'll be sure to take more photos today and post them soon.

Stay cool everyone - and have a good Labor Day Weekend!

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

2006-08-29T23:14:00.000-07:00

There's nothing like a little inversion therapy to relieve stress, stimulate circulation and recover from an intense workout. It keeps my chops healthy too! :P

Kong Busting Technique Instructional Videos

2006-08-24T20:06:00.000-07:00

The Dreaded Kong, Treat dispenser or Jaw Buster? Friend or Foe? You be the judge....

Since my tag post, I've been getting a flood of emails asking me to demonstrate in detail my patented Kong Busting Techique. I feel it would be best to share my wealth of knowledge with fellow canines who's owners think we should "work" for our food. Don't they know we canines are entitled to these treats without the obstacle of a rubberized exterior?

It's simple really. Just click on the following instructional videos and read along.

First: Find a good corner to lodge/wedge the Kong so it doesn't roll around. Face the large opening towards you and start licking vigorously until treat is practically soggy --You may want to take a water break if you run out of saliva... unsurprisingly I never have that problem.

Second: Repeatedly pickup and drop the Kong to agitate the tasty soggy morsel inside until it slides out of the Kong.

There you have it folks-- good luck in your Kong Busting endeavors.

Bulldog Cinema

2006-08-23T23:22:00.000-07:00

I don't know if you guys have ever explored my link buttons on the right over there... but Adam Sandler, the comedian/actor is a bulldog lover and has lots of entertaining Bulldog Movies of his bulldogs, Matzoball, Lucy and the late, great Meatball. That's Matzo's sire in the photo - he appeared in Little Nicky as 'Mr. Beefy'.

I can really relate to the latest movie, 'Couch Rookie'. Know what I mean?

Tag, I'm it.

2006-08-16T09:09:00.000-07:00

I got 'tagged' by Cairo... so it's time let everyone know some of my unique doggie quirks.

First, I'm supposed to repeat the 'rules':
The player of this game starts with "5 weird things/habits about yourself." Then you tag 5 friends and list their names. The furries who get tagged need to write on their blogs about their 5 weird things/habits, as well as state this rule clearly, then tag 5 more victims. Don't forget to leave your victim a comment that says "you're tagged!" in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

Now for the good stuff:

1) My Nightly Suck: Every night, I have to suck on one of my plushy toys. I picked up this habit when I was very young and refuse to give it up. Sometimes, I make my parents sit on the floor with me while I do this. If they refuse, I get annoying and cranky until they cave.

2) My Kong Busting Technique: I've got a Kong dog toy. Kong dog toys have hollow spaces where your folks put treats in. Then, you're supposed to chew on the dang thing until your jaw falls off or the treat breaks up into pieces small enough to fall out. Well... I got this one licked. What I do is push the Kong toy into a corner or up against a wall so it doesn't roll around so much. Then I grab it with my paws and turn it so I can see inside the treat cavity. Then I fish for the treat with my tongue, occasionally looking in to check the position of the treat. After about 10 or 15 minutes, the treat should be sufficiently soggy to proceed to the last step which is to pick up the Kong and throw it or drop it over and over again until the entire treat pops out! Works every time! :P

3) My Dinner Bell: I know when my parents are getting ready to serve me dinner because of the sound that my food dish makes when they handle it. There's no better sound than the sound of kibble ringing into my dish. Mmmmm... makes me drool just thinking about it. Anyhow, when I hear the sound of my dish being handled I automatically trot into my crate (that's where my food gets served) and sit and wait. That way, I save a few precious seconds.

4) My Bed-Time Routine: Just about every night, after my nightly toy suck, I pass out on the living room floor - preferably, between or leaning up against my mom or dads legs (since I likely bothered them till they gave up the couch - where I'm not allowed to go). Anyhow, when they get up and turn off the T.V. I know that it's really time to go to bed. So I get up and head to my crate. Once there, I have to dig up my bed in a special way that gives me a pillow to rest my head on at one end and a cozy pit to snuggle into at the other. Then, my mom or dad has to give me an ice chunk or two (don't you hate waking up with a dry mouth?). Then I tell them to close the flap to my bunker and hit the lights. Of course, if its done wrong - I have to start all over.

5) My Reflexive Air-Licking: This one is kinda embarrassing... but what the Hell. Bullies have tail-pockets, that is... well, we have, like, an arm-pit under our tails. Anyhow, it gets dirty from... well, you know... and from time to time it needs to be cleaned. So when my tail-pocket is being cleaned - I just can't help it - I fanatically lick the air as if my face was burred in an invisible mountain of Frosty Paws.

I tag: Francois, Thomas Peterson, Cyrus The Great, Waldo & Nestle, and Joe Stains or Dufus-Face.

Surf, Sand and Celebrity sightings...

2006-08-13T19:44:00.000-07:00

Living in California, you're bound to bump into a celebrity or two. On my way to the "ARF's Bully Amphibious Training Meetup Seminar" at Huntington Beach, I saw Tyson and Family hanging out enjoying the shade under a palm tree.

At first I wasn't sure if it was really him and so I "checked his I.D" to confirm it was really him. He was gracious enough to pose with me for a photo but as you can see I was too concerned about being late for the seminar.

The seminar proved educational for the ARF recruits and as you can tell we all had fun too. We were trained matadors taunting those waves.

Check out the photos!

Canine + Ninja = CaNinja

2006-08-02T22:41:00.000-07:00

Do you want to become a CaNinja? Then enroll in Thomas Peterson's Canine-defense class!

Not sure? Then this informative video might help answer some of your questions.

Soccer Camp

2006-07-31T22:32:00.000-07:00

Swimming lessons, horseback riding, potato-sack races, religious education and paramilitary training - Talk about summertime fun! There's no better way to spend the summer!

That's why I've volunteered my time and skills to teach a soccer clinic at Ayatollah Mugsy's Youth Indoctrination Camp. Obviously these young ones have much to learn but I'm confident that they will improve once I've crushed their egos - since only then, in the grip of humiliation, can they embrace the canine as superior in yet another aspect of life and thus begin to re-learn the basics of ball-hoggery.

Bulldog Beard Grooming

2006-07-23T14:49:00.000-07:00

Yeah yeah, I know what you are all thinking... and you're wrong. Bulldogs can TOO have beards. Pugs have beards... so why can't bullies have beards too? huh? Answer me that - smarty-pants.

I'm trying to grow out my beard. I can't wait till its nice and full and fluffy. It will serve as a a nice head-rest when my dad isn't around. It's only been a few minutes, and already I seem to have a nice base coat started. I'm sure, with my mom's help, I'll be a shoe-in for the World Beard Championships.

Sleeping in

2006-07-21T14:22:00.000-07:00

Somebody hit the snooze button!

Keeping Up Appearances

2006-07-17T10:03:00.000-07:00

Inspired by Thomas Peterson's latest campaign photos, I thought my old ARF propaganda photos needed a little lomo retouching. ARF's official PR manager (aka Mom) downloaded some photoshop actions from this blogger to achieve the fake lomo effect. Hey--It's cheaper than Botox!

Hot Dog

2006-07-15T11:30:00.000-07:00

It's been so hot latelty it's just criminal. Good thing I've stashed plenty of Frosty Paws and a six-pack of Happy Tail Ale in the fridge.

I've also ordered ARF troops to assemble a summer preparedness kit to keep cool and safe during these sweltering days.
-Doggie Sunblock
- Outward HoundTM H2O on the Go Hydration System Dog Pack
- ChillyDog Cool Vests neck wraps

The Blob

2006-07-09T21:20:00.001-07:00

As captain of the wrestling team, I like to challenge myself by taking on all sorts of opponent. Watch how I take this green blob to school.

4th of July Supplies

2006-07-04T17:32:00.000-07:00

In preperation for this evening's festivities, I made sure to stop by my arms dealer to stock up on some necessities...

FIFA for FIDO

2006-06-16T13:57:00.000-07:00

Did I mention my middle name was Beckham? I've been sharpening my skillz since 12 weeks of age!
Apart from poker, us doggies LOVE Football.

My dad and I have been watching all the world cup games we can.

I've been thinking of organizing an ARF football squad to represent Pugistan.

Be sure to sign up in the comments section if you want to participate! We'll need a goalie so If any of you know how to use your "hands" let me know.

Since we'll be the only canine team, we'll have to practice during the off season with these guys

Luxury ARF HummerK9 SUVs

2006-06-14T09:59:00.000-07:00

ARF Press Release
Los Angeles, CA -- Luxury ARF HummerK9 SUVs are now available to the public. Unlike it's gas guzzling, human transport counterpart, this Eco-friendly human powered vehicle is helping to combat human obesity thus extending the life and overall wellness of your human owner as well as reducing occurrences of heat strokes for us pets.

Standard features include multiple cup holders, raw hide trim interior and a GPS (Greenies Pez-dispensing System). Spinning hub caps not included.

Tech developers from General Atomics Aeronautical Systems
(GAAS) have been contracted to develop a hybrid version of the ARF Hummers by early 2008. The Hybrid version will make use of a pack of harnessed squirrels which should extend it's MPH (miles per human).

Don't be the last doggie on your block to get one!

Who needs ADT when you have a Bully?

2006-06-13T15:01:00.000-07:00

A.R.F. Security Agent saves the Day

Tampa, Florida - A normally quiet English bulldog helped his owner in an attempted robbery early Friday morning. Chris Inman awoke to a noise in his home.

I saw the guy standing up through my window, said Inman. I snapped my fingers and yelled out for Scooter. He came right around me and probably got to the dresser when [the man] came around.

Inman said that his dog pushed the intruder and bit the man's arm.

As a reward, Inman gave Scooter doggie ice cream. He even cooked up a juicy steak for his dog.

Authorities have alerted all local hospitals to be on the lookout for a man with a dog bite on his arm.

When asked for comment, A.R.F. Supreme Commander, Brody the Bulldog, said " The true measure of Scooter's success is his ability to be content, even proud, that he succeeded in his mission through his own courage - leaving only a trail of soggy rawhide in his wake." As a result of his loyalty and bravery, Scooter has been awarded the A.R.F. Silver Bone - a metal of valor.

-Valerie Boey, Tampa Bay's 10 News

Sawin' Logs

2006-06-11T19:23:00.000-07:00

Ever have one of those days where you are just so dog-tired that even snoring wears you out? I'm sure all you smooshed-faced breeds out there know what I'm talking about...
Well, here I am - passed out in my mom's lap - playing a tune on my soft palate.

Border Patrol

2006-06-10T10:26:00.000-07:00

Those terrorist squirels are becoming braver and braver about trying to cross my heavily guarded dog zone in an attempt to reak havoc on mom's jade plants.

I was not detered by his glowing evil beady eyes as I stood guard. Instead I showed him the raggled remains of the last squirel who attempted to get a free jade plant buffet.

Brody Warpup

2006-06-03T19:34:00.000-07:00

Check it out! I made this self portrait for my art expression class which is part of the newly required A.R.F. Canine Ethics curriculum.

Coincidentally, A.R.F. denies all allegations of squirrel massacres and rabbit torture.

Head Rest

2006-05-27T14:38:00.000-07:00

I'm a keen proponent of items that have dual purposes. Take Dad's face for example. Great for licking (specially when he's done eating) but did you know they're also great ottomans for your chin!

Friends in High Places

2006-05-26T18:19:00.000-07:00

Introducing Thomas Peterson.

Alright, alright – I admit it. He’s not quite in a high place… yet. BUT he is running for mayor of Anoka, Minnesota. The way I see it, the more pups in political power, the more likely it is that a dog nation will realized. Therefore, I have agreed to dispatch a battalion of A.R.F. security troops to ensure his safety.

He’s a French Bulldog – a fellow smooshed-face breed who is vehemently against surgical debarkment, relishes both freedom and diversity of belief and has a kick-ass theme song. (click here to listen!)

He also raises credible campaign funds by throwing poker parties. What else brings us dogs together than a good long nighTexastexas hold'’em.

Perhaps, with his political prowess, he can provide universal access to rawhide or convince Starbucks to create more ergonomic frappuccino cups, or help organize a special education program for our mentally challenged cousins.

While I know many of you do not live in Anoka – and thus may not be able vote on your own – there is still time to move there, or at the least, get the word out!

VOTE for Thomas!!

Yappy Berf Day

2006-05-20T11:03:00.000-07:00

You know, it may be the wrinkles... but I only just turned a year old. Still, you'd think that someone with as much knowledge and experience as I have would deserve more than just one lousy cupcake. I know, I know, it's a 'toy' and so it would probably last any 'normal' dog weeks and provide hours and hours of fun. But, c'mon, honestly... its only gonna take 10 minutes to demolish this thing.

I will give you my poker face. Think I'm bluffing?

YEeahh, now THATs what I'm talkin' about. A peanut-butter-turkey cake with yogurt-kibble-carrot topping!! NICE!

Nothing like a check-raise.

Long Beach Bulldog Beauty Contest

2006-05-16T15:21:00.000-07:00

There were plenty of beauty queens that requested personal bullyguards (since lots of humans attempt to squeeze their cheeks and rumps) so I got decked out in my security shirt and shades for this year's Bulldog Beauty Contest.

Good thing I had plenty of other security troops to accompany me since there were over 300 bullies in need of protection. Some of our undercover agents disguised themselves as "Starbucks Lattes". I had a the A.R.F. (Armed Revolutionary Forces) "Special Artillery Unit" present in case the humans got too unruly. We also outsourced some muscle from the SoCal Bull's Angels Gang. (Thanks Dudes!)

Over all the day went well and Bunny (Miss Long Beach) was crowned as this year's Bully Queen. Home town advantage I suppose.

Click here to check out the pics of my day.

Injured

2006-05-08T09:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry folks for the lack of posts lately, but I've been trying to recouperate from an injury sustained during excessive training. --I've been trying to bulk myself up for next week end's upcoming bulldog contest at longbeach and while lifting some weights (mostly my own) my hip got really sore. I'm not juiced up on any roids but mom has me on some "athelic suppliments"

Bay Watch

2006-04-22T12:36:00.000-07:00

After last weekend's security detail, it was time for some fun and relaxation. Mom and Dad took me to the Long Beach Dog Zone where i chased after tennis balls, got my coat all sandy and a much needed tan.

I had to be careful and not chase the tennis ball too far into the surf since I didn't see any Pamela Anderson types walking around willing to give snout to mouth resuscitation.

Check out more pics from my day at the beach here.

Dog Parade

2006-04-12T17:35:00.000-07:00

After delivering Cleveland a clean bow and milkbone, I reported for duty at the Haute Dog Easter Parade where A.R.F. Forces were comissioned to conduct the security detail. Every effort was made to reduce the impact of our security measures on the enjoyment of this historic event - so you may notice I am not wearing the red bow that the Armed Revolutionary Forces usually wear for such distinguished assignments.

After sniffing ID's and checking undercarriages, I policed the frisbee show and then mingled with the croud - looking for 'suspicious' behavior. There were quite a few interesting characters there - including a chicken/dog hybrid, a camel/dog hybrid and a Cotton-candy/dog hybrid. It was quite a day. Check out the photos here.

Kitty Visit

2006-04-07T20:46:00.000-07:00

I was sitting at my usual post near the patio when an a vistor came by to lounge on a chair. At first I really did see him until Mom came out to give the poor guy a dish of food and water. He's been coming by in the mornings and evenings for the past couple days from a long day of hunting I think.
I really had a stong urge of welcoming him myself but my dad wouldn't let me take the BBQ sauce outside.

Click here to see more pictures of Kitty

Hard days work

2006-04-03T11:57:00.000-07:00

It must be the time change but I got caught dozing off at work. I'm so tired, I even fell off my bed and didn't care. But wait a minute, my job IS to snooze all day long!

Looking at this picture now, I realize how studly I am when I'm passed out...

April Fool's Hike

2006-04-02T21:30:00.000-07:00

Mom and Dad decided to pull an April Fool's prank on me. They said if I climbed all the way up to the top of Runyon Canyon that there would be a prize waiting for me there. I got there but there was no prize, just really nice views. -- then again, they did gave me two whole strips of jerky once we got there. I guess anything edible is a prize to me!

Check out the rest of my hiking pictures from this weekend

Nap time with dad

2006-03-24T22:29:00.000-08:00

What's warm, snuggly and absorbs drool? Dad's arm pit!

Rescued by Ayatollah Mugsy

2006-03-17T17:23:00.000-08:00

During operation 'Phat Dog', I was captured deep in enemy territory. They stripped me naked, took my dog-tags, and transported me in a burlap sack to a cold dark concrete kennel where I was kept for what seemed like ages. I became as skinny as a whippet - just a boney 58 lbs - and was subjected to hideous torture such as newspaper beatings and backstreet boys on repeat. Once - oh my god it was horrible - they brought in a frothing vacuum which growled and snapped at me while inches from my face. Good thing it was on a leash.

My years of A.R.F. special forces training paid off as I was able to endure the pain and resist the temptation of telling my captors where the bacon was hidden or who I worked for - however, realizing I was not going to break and determined to turn me into their cash cow, they forced me to stud myself in their puppy mill. It was a very hard time and they worked me to the bone.

Just as I was falling into dispair, a French revolutionary, named Jean-Paul due Boneapart managed to lift my spirits by delivering a piece of jerky with word that the great visionary Ayatollah Mugsy had heard of my capture and was plotting my extraction. As Jean-Paul explained, help was on the way -- but I had to be ready. On the night of the next full moon, I was to wait for the sign... then it would be time.

Over the next week or two, things took a turn for the worse. I was accused of plotting an escape and moved into a maximum security cell deep in the catacombs of the enemy fortress. How would I know when there was a full moon? How would Ayatollah's revolutionaries get me the sign? How would they know I was moved to a new cell?! Worse yet - they said I was guilty of terrorism and was scheduled to be executed in the sleep chamber. My time was running out!!

A few days later, the guard delivered a small scrap of rawhide and some cold french fries. The pit in my stomach deepened... it was my last meal. I was very very sad. Is this what it has come to? It had all happened so fast. Who would lead the Armed Revolutionary Forces? Who would care for all of my pups? Realizing that I had lost, I started to cry. I raised my head and howled a poor and lonely howl which echoed down the chambers of the dungeon.

Then a funny thing happened. My echoes didn't dissipate. They got louder and stronger. Then I realized, it wasn't my echo - it was the other prisoners howling! It must be a full moon! And there are so many... so loud... That's it! It's the sign! The howling is a diversion! Now is my chance!

I got right to work digging around the door and giving it several running head-butts. Before I had made much progress, I heard the jingle of keys. When door swung open, Jean-Paul and two of my pups greeted me and handed me my gear. "HURRY Father!" said the young bullies. They lead me to the woof, I mean, roof of the building where the faint sound of choppers was almost immediately drowned out by the enemy's alarm. "NON! SacrÃ© Bleu! We've euhh been discovered!" shouted Jean-Paul, "I must leave you here mon ami - bon voyage!" And with that - he disappeared into the darkness.

Like lightening and thunder, choppers began swarming out of the darkness. Rockets and gunfire filled the air. I took cover with my two chubby pups as a copter spiraled in. I could tell by the turban that behind the night vision goggles sat Ayatollah Mugsy. As it set down, I climbed in and motioned to my pups to hop up - but they wouldn't. I felt Ayatollah's paw on my shoulder. "I'm sorry Brody" he said.

"Don't worry about us! A.R.F. needs you! Hurry Father!" yipped the paddle-pawed tikes. And before I could protest, the helicopter peeled back off the roof. I watched as the pups scampered across the roof towards a zip line - I wondered if I would ever see them again. "Do not fear Brody" reassured Ayatollah "They are strong like their sire. When we return, they will be ready. Our enemies do not realize our forces are already sleeping under their tables. Those pups will play an important role in the revolution. Let Jean-Paul guide them now."

Thus I realized Ayatollah's master plan was a much greater vision. And that my rescue was only the beginning. Not only would my pups be rescued, but the entire canine species would be as well.

Lazy Sunday

2006-03-12T21:28:00.001-08:00

Met up with Ruby at the local coffee shop to catch up. I ordered a couple Pupcakes at the bakery while I waited.

When she finally came by we shared it and people watched.

Liquid Kryptonite

2006-03-10T15:42:00.000-08:00

Mom (aka Lex Luther) has been walking around with a green spray bottle. It weakens me from jumping on to the couches, beds or ottomans...damn you mom! -- had you not been feeding me for the past 10 months, there would be serious consiquences for you-- like the saying goes..never bite the hand that feeds you!

Laundry day

2006-03-04T22:43:00.000-08:00

The white box ate my bed again so I have to wait here until is gives it back. In the meantime I have to improvise with what's available-- personally, I think my bed smells better.

Singing Pup Stars

2006-02-28T22:09:00.000-08:00

Check out these American Idol hopefuls - they may be young, but they've got potential! Hey Randy Jackson - get an earfull of THESE DOGS!!

I can see my house from here!

2006-02-25T20:37:00.000-08:00

I love a good challenge. Like finishing my bowl of kibble in under 60 seconds, ripping apart any new toys within a week -- and proving to the world that bullies can also be into extreme sports. Yes, forget those skate boarding bulldogs, it's all about hiking bullies!

Plus! there are some great places to hide your private stash on a hiking trail. Which reminds me...didn't I leave something here last week end?
Man... I hate it when this happens. I've burried a stash of bones around here somewhere and now I can't remember where it is. And these weren't just any old leftovers either - these babys were still covered in sauce. Mmmmmm. I've been sniffing around everywhere but I haven't had much luck yet. I know they're around here somewhere!

Don't forget the canolis

2006-02-15T22:38:00.000-08:00

As consigliere of the southern california bully family, I was called in to see the bosses. They wanted to know the state of the family business, sort out any beefs anyone may have with each other. Apparently, the Poochino Family from the East coast is under investigation again so we need to make sure our west coast business is under wraps and that any "problems" are "taken care of."

Everyone was there - Fat Tony, Stevie Beefs, Stan "Itchy Paws" D'Ogatello, Johnny Meatball, Alfonzo Baconetti, The Twins, Big Lou, Little Sammy - -just to name a few! It's been a long time since I sniffed half of these guys so it was a long awaited reunion.

Check out the photos of the meeting

The Great Pumpkin

2006-02-10T08:39:00.000-08:00

It's amazing how attentive and focused I get when Mom starts waving one of her homemade pumpkin biscuits in my face.
What I'm actually doing is using my brain waves to guide the biscuit to it's destined place in the universe (along with alot of other things) -- in my belly of course!
Click here to download the recipe!

Raging Bull

2006-02-04T21:45:00.000-08:00

I arrived at the dog park, ready for a cage match and wondering who my opponent would be. Then - can you believe it?! - Taz walks in... and he was wearing almost the exact same outfit I had on!

Anyhow - Taz saw me eyeing him - so he walked right up to me and started talking smack. I gave him an eyebrow-glare that would have even made The Rock tremble like moist ALPO.

I knew right then that Taz was gonna get a taste of the Bully Bomber.

Then it was on.

Lucky for Taz, I had my can-opener - so the whoop-ass was quickly served up.

Needless to say I was victorious, but don't worry - Taz and I are still good buddies. Click here for more pics!

Uncle!!!!

2006-02-03T22:11:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to practice for tomorrow's big Open Wrestling Tournament at the dog park.

So my dad oblidged me to a wrestling match as I noticed I was getting rusty.

He managed to pin me down and give me a noogie! I was more rusty than I thought!

To Infinity & Beyond!

2006-02-01T22:06:00.000-08:00

Have you ever seen dogs fly through lazer beams? Now's your chance! And, trust me - it looks better than it sounds.
The only thing missing from this stylish video is a frisbee.

Seriously, these videos by Pleix are amazing. Be sure to check out 'Birds' (pictured above) and 'NetLag' - my favorites.

Imposter

2006-01-29T21:35:00.000-08:00

My parents took me to another den yesterday for a party. I met this strange dog there and I think it was an imposter...
My first suspicion arose when we greeted, I couldn't tell if it was a boy or girl. But, I figured, maybe - you know - it had been neutered, spayed or, perhaps, had just taken a bath... Except, it smelled strangely carrot-like. Now, I've tasted carrots, and they are Ok, but - C'mon! - dog's don't like carrots THAT much.

Then my suspicion grew when it failed to 'greet' me back. No circling, no tail-wagging, no nothing! I could see its nose and it was working alright... but, it was like, it didn't know proper dog etiquette! How rude!

In hindsight, I'm not so sure it was a dog. It may have been a dog toy in disguise. So be on the lookout. Keep an eye on your food dish, check under your dog beds, and make sure our dog toys are extra dead - there may be spies among us!

Operation Pork Chop

2006-01-27T17:51:00.000-08:00

After being informed of the recent swine attacks in Florida, I have coordinated a effort to stem the hog-hound tensions that have persisted the rural south.

A.R.F. will activate a secret weapon... a dog on the inside...

Flash, the dog we all know and love from The Dukes of Hazzard, has volunteered to fly - unarmed - straight into the pigs nest, in an effort to confront Boss Hog and convince him to stop his ruthless exploitation of poor, homeless and immigrant canines from live bacon mastication.

No doubt, Flash is trying to make up for his tarnished image since the remake of his once respected series. Flash, we admire your bravery. You are sincerely one of the great doggie diplomats of the canine era.

Techno Dog

2006-01-20T23:59:00.000-08:00

Lesson #2

Information and communication is key.

Our ARF Communications and Recon Equipment has just arrived.

Shaped like a bone, this device allows paws free use by operating as a speakerphone and picking up automatically when called. It is mounted on a red strap for wearing around the neck (no clunky headset needed), and is labeled with a large paw —because The PetsCell, as it is called, is a mobile cellular communication unit for dogs on the go. See PetsMobility for more details. Keep in mind recruits, calling 900 numbers will not be tolerated and remember... big brother may be listening.

This GPS Doggie Tracking Unit from globalpetfinder gives ARF battlefield commanders the opportunity to see the location of every soldier and the ability to employ forces as needed.

However, it is essential that these units do not fall into the wrong hands, thus while it is advantageous that the location of a captured soldier or civilian be known so rescue forces can immediately respond, it is required that each recruit destroy his locator in the event of capture.

Name That Pug!

2006-01-20T16:24:00.000-08:00

Can you believe it? This lil' guy needs a name!

He is about to be adopted and for some reason, he can't remember his name. He must have had a troubled past to have amnesia like this or perhaps he is in the Pug Protection Program. Either way, his human is taking suggestions on his blog, and I figured some of you may have worthy suggestions that would preserve this Pugs dignity and spare him from the humiliation of a name resembling his human's blog-theme.

These are his Info and rules:
The dog is a Pug
The dog is a male
The name should be humorous
The name cannot be Meathead, Piggy, Fatty or Bud/Buddy

If [his human] should choose the name you submit, [his human] will provide you with an Amazon.com gift certificate worth $10US, as thanks. This does not necessarily mean that [his human] will limit my choice of names to those submitted.

Pyrotechnics for Dogs

2006-01-18T13:32:00.000-08:00

Lesson #1

Observe this training video demonstrating advanced pyrotechnics handling and improvised assault.

See how the recruit remains focused and uses precision timing and lightening speed. By maintaining a low profile the recruit attains steath mode by cruising under the enemy's radar (note the short legs). Also, notice that the pup aims the mortar by selecting the correct grip and then circles to the left - a technique learned from our herding seminar. Lastly, rest assured, while you can clearly hear the humans cackling in fear - none were harmed in the making of this video.

Commando for Hire

2006-01-14T11:30:00.000-08:00

I know I'm technically not a 'working' breed, but my friend Ayatollah Mugsy needs a brick wall demolished. Below is my resume, but I need references. So for those of you who know me, please post a reference in the comments. Wish me luck!

Brody The Bulldog

AKA - Bro, Ice Man, PupDaddy, Kong-Killah

Bull by the Horns
www.brodysbunker.blogspot.com
BrodytheBulldog@Yahoo.com

Skills:
Inherent Bulldog strength
Naturally excellent in teeth-bearing and eyebrow-shifting
Black collar level in toy assault
Skilled in AssGass utilization for crowd control
Self-taught proficiency in beggary
Not afraid of Thunder

Accomplishments:
Total kills: 49
-- Plush Toys: 8
-- Chew Toys: 10
-- Squeaky Toys: 6
-- Soccer Balls: 4
-- Greenies: 17
-- Television Remote: 1
-- Mom's Unmentionables: 3

No Criminal Record as of Jan. 2006
Co-Captain of Dog Park Wrestling Team - Current
Successfully completed Dog Camp, a 3-week intensive Pack-Commando training program. Winter 2005/2006
Headbutt Mom's kitchen doggie gate to oblivion - Sept. 2005
House Trained - Aug. 2005

Hobbies:
Gnawing
Texas-Hold'em